Thursday, September 14, 2017

#stay // your light matters


when sweet sweet elissa asked me to write a post on the word "stay" in honor of World Suicide Prevention Week and her dear friend Maddy who passed away on Oct. 4th, it got me thinking of a lot of moments in my life where "stay" was difficult. I remember having to move and loving where we lived, i wanted to stay. i remember my dad holding on to the last of his days, being told i had to let him go, when all i wanted was for him to stay with me. I remember the anxiety and sadness i felt, and not wanting to stay anymore. but most of all, i remember the whisper i heard, telling me to "stay," because i was never alone.

so what does stay mean to you? for me, i see it different ways

i. staying present. it's hard these days to sometimes just keep yourself planted in the now, instead of alway being worried about the future. but staying present, taking note of where you are and respecting that, that's what staying should look like.

ii. staying faithful. this is a hard one sometimes, because it's easy to want to do your own thing and to think you can figure it all out on your own, but stay faithful to the Lord. seek his presence, give him your time, and live your life in step with Christ. stay faithful, fighting the good fight.

iii. staying hopeful. it hurts when people tell you to just be positive, because i get it, that's not always possible, but don't lose hope. one of the many many wonderful things that our Lord gives us, is never-ending, unrelenting, overflowing grace and hope. because of him, we can have hope for the future and say "it is well with my soul."

so honey, i know life is hard, i know there are struggles that no one knows about, that you're ashamed of, that you keep hidden in the darkest corner of your closet. i know, because i've been there, i've hid in that closet, fists held tight, eyes blurred, and silent sobs so no one would hear. it's so lonely, and scary, and small, but you know what dear friends? that small closet is never too small for God. stay, and find refuge in him. stay, because your light matters 

stay-what does that word make you think/

love you all my sweet friends,

Elizabeth


(find out more about Elissa and why she's so passionate about this topic here)


Tuesday, September 5, 2017

Walking the Streets of Seattle // SBL 2k17


Hey there,

It's official, August has ended and the beginning stages of fall will soon be upon us. Hasn't this summer gone by quickly? For me, it's been jammed pack. Any free day where I wasn't working or had a bucket load of homework, I tried to squeeze in some adventures. I was actually looking at my August page of my agenda, and realized not one day was left unmarked. With that being said, I'm so thankful for the lovely times I've had this month.

On August 30th, my friend Chloe and I took to the streets of Seattle to explore. Chloe is one my best friends, and she's actually leaving for YWAM in Amsterdam this September on the 17th. I'm so beyond proud of her and I know she'll have an amazing experience, but nonetheless, it's hard to see her go. To have one last adventure together, we visited Seattle like true tourists, and of course, recorded it using Chloe's beautiful camera and photography skills. 





Our first stop (after 30 minutes of driving in circles attempting to find parking) was Pike Place Market. If we were to explore Seattle like a tourist, this was a must. I for one am not a fan of large crowds, but the market is such a classic and has lots of interesting items. I adore all the flower stands, though I've never actually bought any (only because I didn't want to walk around carrying them for the rest of the day). There are also numerous book stores, candy shops, food stands, and more. I tried my first turkish delight (it was amazing) and listened to amazing street music. Would Pike Place be somewhere I longed to visit all the time? No, but it's a nice spot and definitely and important place to visit when exploring Seattle.




Of course, to add to our tourist activities, we took to the waterfront. The waterfront has some more cute shops, lots of seafood, the Seattle Aquarium, and the great ferris wheel. I'd never been on the ferris wheel, mostly because it costs a lot and being stuck in a cage while it goes in circles never appealed to me, but it was actually quite a lovely experience. The views up top were beautiful, you could not only see the city, but look across the water as well while boats were sailing by. Lots of pictures were taken by Chloe (many that are not shown) and it was definitely worth the stop!


After our day of walking and exploring (and find this adorable pink wall), we found a starbucks for the much needed coffee boost, and explored the city by walking and shopping and getting lost. As someone whose grown up in a small little valley, it takes awhile for me to feel comfortable in the city, but as the day came to a close, I was finding myself more and more in love with the bustling of people, towering buildings, and coffee shops on every corner. Maybe I'm not ready to move to a large city yet, but I have a feeling Seattle may be seeing more of me. 

Did you grow up in the city, or more away from the hustle and bustle? Which environment do you prefer? I think both have lots of positives, but I'd have to say I do love the quiet and easy parking that my valley has. Makes for a much less stressed Liz.

Have a wonderful day,

Elizabeth

Saturday, August 26, 2017

feeling stuck in the midst of restlessness


i. i feel sorta stuck, you know? i'm stuck in my hometown, while almost everyone i know who is my age is off to college, or traveling, or interning. i feel like, yes, doing another year of community college and working is the smarter option, but i can't shake the feeling of loneliness when I see everyone else up and go. i've been so restless lately, but i know that in my restlessness, i need to rest in the Lord and trust that He knows best and has a plan for my life. i've been learning over and over and over that life rarely goes according to my plan, because it isn't my plan that God is concerned with, but His own perfect plan. so even though i continue to bear a feeling of looniness, i know that sometimes i have to just feel restless, while resting in my Lord's perfect plan

ii. but the restlessness makes me anxious. sometimes it's hard to sleep, because i continue to wake up from dreams. everything seems so overwhelming. i live in a mess of a room because the thought of picking it up makes me want to lay back in bed and close my eyes. at work, people ask my if i'm okay because i'm "quiet." i didn't realize i was acting like i wasn't okay, but now i feel weird. my finals were hard, and i'm scared i didn't pass them all. i don't have the time or money to retake classes, so my hands have been shaking for hours and my eyes continue to check my phone in search of a grade update. my shoulders ache from tension and my head begins to pound. resting in the Lord is so so hard, because becoming anxious is so easy, and being patient seems so hard

iii. yet, sleep always come, darkness turns to light, and a new day appears. the wave of anxiety and stress continue to ebb and flow, but the steadfastness of the Lord never fails, so i wait in His arms. when i can't sleep, i cry out in prayer. when my body aches, i lean into Him. when my hands shake uncontrollably because the answer is taking too long, i repeat, "He is faithful." and when i can only see the bad, i write out the good. because sometimes it's so much easer to see all the bad in our life, but the reality is, our blessings are so much more. so i thank God for who i am, and where i am, and i know that even in the midst restlessness, God is always good.


muddled up thoughts from a midnight ramble. what has God been teaching you lately? how do you react when faced with restlessness in your life?

love you all lots,

elizabeth

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