i forgot how to write...again

Hello there my friends,

Do you remember two years ago when I wrote a post updating you all on my life, after a super long absence? Remember how I said I needed to write more? Here I am again, writing a very similar post, with only three posts sitting in-between them. I suppose keeping up with my blog and living life was more complicated than I thought. I long to write and to be more present on this little corner of the internet. Writing truly brings me so much joy, as does interacting with each and every one of you. Plus, I love looking back at my old posts and having a tiny little scrapbook of my life.

All of that to say, I am sure I am not alone in thinking, wow. It's truly been a crazy eventful year, and not just because of COVID. Life has thrown me some curveballs, changes, and major joys. Almost all of it, though, has been unexpected.  I often take time to reflect each year where I was in life the previous year, and how much everything has changed, but 2020 has possibly topped them all. Where do I even begin?

 

Spring 2020. I suddenly found myself with a lot of time to read, hangout with my roommate Chloe, do school, and just generally relax and take it slow as the world turned upside down. After returning from traveling to Germany and North Africa for a few weeks, we were thrown into quarantine. As an introvert and homebody, this seemed like a welcome break from the world for a little bit, but I do have to admit that after a month or so, I did find my mood becoming quite withdrawn and depressed. I'm so thankful for the many mornings spent laughing with Chloe, a bookcase full of books, plenty of time to experiment with new recipes, social-distanced walks and hikes with my family and friends, and school assignments to keep me busy and engaged. 

Summer 2020. Lots of sunshine, adventures out in nature, and picnics with friends outside-which. funfact!-five minutes after the photo of my friend Demi and I picnicking was taken, two cops came speeding over and pulled a gun on a man who was 30 feet away from us. Only slightly sketchy. But one of my favorite changes that Summer brought me, was Walker. Our love story came from out of nowhere it seemed, and quickly turned serious. From friends from church, to boyfriend and girlfriend in just a few weeks, it only took a couple dates for us to figure out that this was forever. Our summer was filled with long conversations in his 4runner, walks along the water, picnics at the park with cards, and trying new things (like rock climbing). Never has there been a summer for me more filled with smiles and giggles.

September 2020. Walker and I accompanied my family on a roadtrip to Montana. We explored all over Glacier National Park, even in the intense smoke. We went on a few incredible hikes, saw some beautiful waterfalls, and got to even catch a few glimpses of some grizzly bears (though granted, from pretty far away). Afterwards, we spent some time with my brother and sister-in-law, and later visited Walker's sister, before returning home to Washington. It was such a special trip full of memories and experiences I know I will remember fondly for years. Plus, after spending hours and hours in a car together and not getting sick of one another, we returned home pretty certain that we'd be taking all of our future roadtrips together.

October-December 2020. My last quarter of junior year began to kick my butt. Balancing work, relationships, church, and university was challenging, yet I wouldn't have wanted to drop any of it. Walker and I continued to enjoy many outings together. I started a new job as a preschool teacher and suddenly found myself spending a lot of time with four and five year olds. I took an Old Testament class at a secular university, which, wow, was so interesting to hear what others believed, and, at times, proved difficult to defend my faith. Walker, Chloe and I enjoyed decorating our apartment together (we needed Walker to get to all the high places for us). And finally, the end of the year found me engaged and ready to plan a wedding in just six weeks.

February 2021. Walker and I got married, moved into our first apartment together, and began learning how to live life as a married couple. As I'm writing this, it's been almost a month since we said our vows, and time has just completely flown by. Really, this entire year has taught me just how fast life goes and how important it is to be thankful for every moment. The Lord has blessed me immensely, and I would never want to take a smidgen of it for granted. 

How has your year been? What have you been learning, experiencing, facing challenges with? As I said, I am certain that I am not the only one who can attest to this being a crazy time. Let me know what kind of crazy it's been for you down below in the comments.

Talk to you soon my friends,

Elizabeth

Snapshots of Germany

This past February I had the opportunity to go visit my brother and sister-in-law in Germany. Germany never fails to draw me in with its magic. I could spend forever walking along its cobblestone streets with my face up towards the sky staring at steeples. I adore peeking into crowded bookshops, even when every book is in German or French, or finding tea shops that smell like a million different flowers. And I haven't even gotten started on the food.

But most of all, I love my family there. My brother and his wife. Their love for Christ overflows in their love for one another and the love they have for those around them. Being with them is being at home, which makes Germany feel like a little sliver of home. I just adore anytime spent with them and always leave feeling refreshed and encouraged.

Where/who is a little piece of home for you, away from home? Something or someone that feels just like on giant, warm hug. I dearly hope we all have a place or person like that, and that we can be that person for others. 

Praying you have a peaceful week,

Elizabeth

My 2020 Reading Goals

Hello dear friends.

2019 was a wild ride for me, full of travel, growth in my faith, starting a new job, moving into a new apartment, and last but not least-reading.

There were months I read a lot, and months I read not at all. Of course, this had to do with  everything that was going on in my life, but it also had to do with the lack of discipline I had. Reading, yes, should be seen as fun, but I will often allow myself to veg and watch Netflix, or scroll on Instagram for an hour, versus picking up a book.

My hope this year is to read more that I did in 2020, so I created a couple of reading goals that will ideally hold me to that. Guidelines, you could say.

1. Read 60 books (5 books a month)

Last year I read 50 books, which is a lot and I'm happy with that number, but I also know I'm capable I'm reading much more than that. Half of 2019 I spent outside of the States, and while being back home, I definitely spent a large amount of time rewatching shows like Friends and The Office, instead of reading. This year, I've set the challenge to at least 60. So far this is going well, as I've already finished 5 books (yay!).

2. Read at least 1 nonfiction book a month

If I allow myself, I will mainly read fiction. Although there's nothing wrong with fiction (I love a good fiction novel), I want to be more intentional with my reading. I want to make sure to set some time aside to learn about other people, current events, history, etc. Especially if I'm studying English Lit at school, I'm going to need to make an effort to actually read something other than fiction.

3. Read at least 1 classic a month

I tend to be someone who reads classics a lot, but I can also go months without picking up a classic. Come this Spring I will be beginning my English Lit degree, so I shouldn't have too much of a challenge here, but I wanted to make it a goal nonetheless. There are countless classics I want to get to.

4. Read poetry every night before bed

Now I can't be the only person who just scrolls on their phone before bed, ya? But that is something I most certainly want to erase from my nightly routine this year. Instead, I'm trying to replace watching youtube videos or instagram stories every night with reading some poetry. This will most likely not happen every night, as I'm only human, but I'm going to do my best to make it a priority.

5. Read at least 3 books from my bookshelf a month

I've always been someone with way more books on my shelf that I haven't read, versus ones that I have. Currently I have at least 100 books on my shelf, and I've maybe read 25% of them? It's not good guys. My goal is to look at my bookshelf first for books to read, instead of buying more or only using the library (although I whole heartedly love libraries and think people should use them more). I also want to practice only keeping the books I actually enjoy or intend to read, and donating the rest to my local library, or reselling them to my favorite used bookstores.

6. Buy no more than 2 books a month

Going off of my last goal, I want to restrict myself from buying no more than 2 books a month (not including books for school). I'm going to try and buy even less than 2 books a month, but for my own book buying sanity, I've set it to 2 for now. One thing I'll do to help myself in this department is to look at my local library first before purchasing anything. Libraries are such an incredible source and should be used WAY more. Seriously, go visit your local library.

7. Write a review for every book I finish

Finally, I want to get better at writing at least a sentence or two about every book I finish. I find it such a good resource to have a record of my thoughts on every book I read. Star ratings simply are not enough.

What are your reading goals for 2020? Do you have any reading recommendations for me? I'm hoping to update you all only my reading every month, but if you want to stalk my reading life in more depth, make sure to follow me on goodreads.

Have a lovely day,

Elizabeth

Was it real? // Today I Noticed #1

A few months back, I began a new writing challenge. Every day (or as much as I could) I would freewrite in my journal beginning with "Today I noticed." It's something I've started to do again, but I've also been looking at some of the old entries. Some of them are full of jumbled up words because I was too tired, others have some wisdom to them, and others are just downright silly.

Today I decided to share one of my entries.

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Today I noticed just how much I question my interactions with others. I've always considered myself an open person. I want to create deep, personal relationships with others. I want to be real-and I think I am! It's after those real encounters that I begin to question the authenticity of them. 

I'm a firm believer that some of the best conversations start in the car. Liv and I carpooled to the city together today and just talked. We talked about love, travel, shame, privilege, pain. We talked about things that matter, and it felt real.

Was it real?

And you see, I begin to ask myself that question because I know the things she's said about me in the past. What if she tells people what I told her? What if I get hurt?

Today I noticed that to live a truly vulnerable life, you can't begin to question every tiny or big interaction you have with someone. You can't control what they do, or say, or feel. All you can be is truly yourself. 

Overall, I'm choosing to look at the evening as a good one. No matter how real or fake it was, I know for certain that I was real, we got to know each other better, and it was a beautiful night in the city. 

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*names and location have been changed for privacy.

Do you find vulnerability hard? Do you often feel guarded around others? Consider how leading a more vulnerable life could bless you and those around you! Remember that no matter how much you care about what others think about you, the only thoughts and mindset you can change is your own. 

Hoping you're all having a lovely day!

Elizabeth

i forgot how to write.

Life gets crazy and I get lazy and next thing I know, it's been months since I've even looked at my blog.

I forgot what words are and how one can use them to create movement, change, and inspiration.
That happens when writing becomes convincing your professor to give you an A.

I forgot that writing brought me joy and discovery and release.
So much better than netflix or chocolate, am I right?

It's been awhile since I popped on over here to say hi. A lot has changed in the last few months that is exciting and new, but life has also been full of mood swings and confusion. I've been avoiding writing anything, here or on paper, because I'm afraid to face my thoughts.

it's time to face my thoughts. You ready?

I graduated with my AA-DTA, which means I'm half way done with university! This is just one more step in completing my goal of getting my BA. From there, who knows what will happen. Honestly. I'm in serious need of help in that aspect. I'm pretty sure I change my mind on what I want to study and where I want to study every five days or so. There are many factors, including money, relationships, future occupations. I'm trying to learn to remain present even when every cell of my brain is screaming to know what is ahead.

I moved half way around the world to study a different language and eat lots of food and cry about missing my dog. That's what a gap year is all about, right? It's been a huge move-being immersed in a different culture and having to be independent, but it's been so so good. I cry a lot and boy there's no way I could do this without the Lord sustaining me with joy, strength, and boldness every day, but every day He does, and I'm so glad to be here.

I'm so thankful for the people back at home. It's so easy to feel as if I'm split in half living in a different country and creating new friendships and family here, when everyone in my former (yet still current) life are back at home in the States. Despite that, I've never felt pushed away or isolated. My friends and family still continue to update me, pray for me, encourage me, and send me silly selfies. I'm so grateful for the encouraging and faithful relationships I have back at home.

I'm learning that there is never an end to my relationship with God or in the studying of His word. In fact, the more I study and confess, the more I see just how messy I am. I thought I was ready to teach people about what I know, but in reality, it's been much more like God teaching me, me crying, being confused, falling on my face, and then talking about what God has been teaching me. It's humbling and hard, and I don't think that pattern will stop anytime soon. Maybe less crying, but no promises.

Look at me! I have a huge smile on my face. Obviously I needed to jump back on here. Although I've been a bit (or very) inactive over here, I've been trying to stay somewhat active over on my instagram. It's been so encouraging to see how the Lord is working in all of your lives, and to have the continued support of the blogging community over on that platform.

I was talking to a new friend the other day about what I was passionate about, and I started talking about writing and building community, only to realize just how long it had actually been since I'd done that. I've missed my little corner of the internet. I'm not sure how active I'll be on my blog for the next couple of months, but writing is what I love. You'll see me again.

What have your thoughts been recently? How has God been working in your life in the last few months or so? Leave me a comment below and let me know how you're doing, dear.


Talk to you shortly,

Elizabeth

How Eating Snails Changed My Life

As I grabbed my backpack and walked toward the van taking us to SeaTac, my friends and I were surrounded by crying, fear struck family members. There was this nervous air surrounding us, yet I didn’t quite understand why. Was going to North Africa really going to be that scary? 

When I get asked as to why I like to travel, the first thing I say is, “To experience new cultures and meet amazing people.” Having lived in America all my life, I started creating this safe little bubble. The starving kids or hurricane-ravaged cities seemed so far away. Those countries and people living in them started to become “others” to me.

When I began to tell people I was going to North Africa back in March 2016, the first thing they’d say to me was normally along the lines of, “Is that really safe?” Or “You should probably go somewhere more welcoming.” Yet, not one of these people had visited the country I was going to. 

While on my trip, some of my friends and I visited a woman living in one of North Africa’s larger cities. Without even knowing who we were, she welcomed us into her tiny home with open arms. Right away, we were sat down and given food. We laughed together as we watched Saudi Arabian soap dramas and drank mint tea. Through a translator, she told us her story, crying as she held up pictures of her loved ones. Her story was a sad one, with her husband having another family he lives with and the struggle to provide for her children, yet there was so much giving in her. Even with the language barrier, I felt so connected with this lady. Leaving was the hardest part, for as she gave me a kiss on each cheek, I couldn’t help but think that I would never see her again. 

This woman was one of the people my friends and family were telling me was unsafe, merely because she lived in North Africa and didn't have the same privileges many of us in Western cultures have. 

This is why traveling is so valuable. The people I met along the way showed me just how ignorant of a life I had been living. Suddenly, they became real people with real problems, feelings, and families. People with real lives. No longer was I an outsider, living on the other side of the world, pretending to know how these people live, act and interact with one another. Instead, I was being welcomed into their homes and treated like one of them. And not because I asked to, but because they wanted me to.

As I prepare to leave for North Africa once again in the fall, I call out the crying and the “it’s not safe over there.” I tell my friends and family about being welcomed into homes of strangers and being taught how to make traditional meals, or being brought to “secret” local places and tricked into eating snails. I talk about the friendliness and love I experienced by almost every single person I met. The laughs, tears, hugs, and blessings. But most of all, I urge them to go. 

I urge them to go out of their comfort zones and greet the world like friends. To not deem places of being unsafe because of appearance, the media, or prejudice. I urge them to go experience the world outside of the tiny bubble the people of America have created for themselves. Because that is what changed my life.

Will you let it change yours? 

What will you do? Don't feel like traveling is scary, or even unattainable. Go experience this beautifully diverse world we live in. Don't shy away from sharing the gospel and loving the people in every corner of the world you travel to. Step out of your comfort zone. Do it! You will never regret it.

If you would like to learn more about my upcoming travels, shoot me an email at whimsicalthoughtss@gmail.com

Happy Traveling!

Elizabeth

Finding the Power in Poetry

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

Poetry is something I've always been interested in. Back in middle school, it was writing angsty poetry about anger, or being rejected by a boy. As I grew older, it began to evolve. Had more depth to it. Yet, poetry still felt like it made little difference to how the people around me saw the world. I was made fun of for writing it, or liking it. Either that, or my fellow students and I were left to beat at a poem to discover some unseeable meaning. Poetry, to me, was special, yet not powerful.

On June 18th-19th, I got the amazing privilege to attend the Skagit River Poetry Festival, a poetry festival where poets from all over attend in the Pacific Northwest to talk about poetry, give advice, and read. According to Molly McNulty, executive direct of the Skagit River Poetry Foundation, the festival's goal is to be a "love letter" to the community. To sum it up? It was powerful. But don't worry, I enjoy writing much too much to just give you a summarized version of this event.

During my last quarter of college before graduating with my AA-DTA, I took a class with the intention to study poetry and how the written word interacts with performance and the audience. It was through this class that I got to attend the festival and shadow a poet for two days. The poet I got to shadow was Lena Khalaf Tuffaha. It was through her that I learned the power of poetry.

Tuffaha is a first-generation American and has Palestinian, Jordanian, and Syrian heritage. Many of her poems are about crossing cultural and political boarders. In an interview with her, I got to ask her a little bit about why she writes what she writes. She told me that as a writer, she feels a responsibility to tell the truth of what is happening in her homeland and the lives that are being affected there. Here's a little sample of her work:

"Run.
You have 58 seconds from the end of this message.
Your house is next.
They think of it as some kind of
war-time courtesy.
It doesn't matter that
there is nowhere to run to.
It means nothing that the borders are closed
and your papers are worthless
and mark you only for a life sentence
in this prison by the sea
and the alleyways are narrow
and here are more human lives
packed against the other
more than any other place on earth
Just run.
We aren't trying to kill you." (An excerpt of "Running Orders" from Water & Salt)

Tuffaha told me about her home. About the library her grandfather had and the countless hours she spent reading. The influence that had on her poetry. Yet, so much of that is being destroyed. It broke my heart. "How can I create a change?" I asked. She told me, to simply use my knowledge of the world to create a change in the people I know. In other words, don't let sexism, racism, and other offensive behavior go uncalled, especially with the people you know and who trust you. Use your light to shine in the darkness. But most of all, don't under estimate the power of the written word and a passion to create change.

Poetry is power.

I saw this in other poets as well. Tina Chang reminded the audience that every missing child could be one of our own. Ada Limon described the feeling of watching a life slip away right before your eyes. Quenton Baker used spoken word to transform the audience to slave ship. And every single time, I was right there. I was walking with the child and then he disappeared. I held the hand of the dying person until it went limp. I saw the shivering mass of bodies huddled in fear as the boat rocked violently. All it was were words, but it was what were in those words that mattered.

It's easy to think that your words don't matter. That no one will get, or even want to hear, what you have to say. It's not true. Your words, passions, experiences, they have so much power. Use them. Celebrate them. Embrace them.

Most of all, I invite you to find the power of poetry. Allow it to give you a different view of the world.

If you would like to learn more about Lena Khalaf Tuffaha, click here.
If you would like to learn more about the Skagit River Poetry Foundation, click here.
If you would like to read some of my poetry, click here.

What does the power of poetry mean to you? We all have something to say. Go ahead, pick up that pen, and write. But don't write for the world. First, write for yourself. 

Happy writing,

Elizabeth

Backpacking Through Ireland

Hello friends,

As you may know if you follow me on Instagram (go do it), I went to Ireland over spring break. I'd always wanted to visit everywhere and anywhere in Europe, so after I found out my friend Chloe would be there over my spring break, I knew this was the time to go. My friend Sasha, who has been living in Russia the last few months, also was able to meet us. Honestly, seeing these girls and getting away from work and college was SO needed.

I've had multiple people ask me "So Liz, how was Ireland?" And honestly, I've never sure how to respond. Awesome. Great. Amazing. Adventurous. New. Tiring. Good, so so good. It was one of those experiences, that the entire time leading up to it, and even while I was there, I couldn't quite believe it. But what truly made the trip so memorable were the girls I spent it with. From getting dropped off on the side of the street in the middle of nowhere at night after missing a bus stop and getting snowed in at our airbnb, to sneaking in a third person into our hotel room (lots of giggles involved ) and visiting a Lord of the Rings themed pub with a "stalker" trailing us, there were so many crazy times where we just had to laugh (and frantically figure out what to do). I was so thankful they were by my side the entire time.

When I was preparing to leave, I knew I wanted to visit the Cliffs of Moher. Let me tell you, they were amazing! If you can get past all the tourists and are daring enough to venture past the walkway (ahem and ignore a couple signs) you will find yourself much more alone and with a better view.

I didn't realize just how much beautiful scenery Ireland had to offer, though, and my friends and I only explored a tiny scratch of it.

Can't get enough from just photos? Want to watch a weird video of my friends and I? Go for it darling.

Wow guys, it's been a long time. I got back from Ireland completely refreshed, but then work started again, and my final quarter of college before I graduate with my Associate's (three more weeks!!) and I just got so tired. Have you ever been so tired or overwhelmed that the things your normally love become a chore? That's what writing was becoming, so I had to take a step back for a little bit. But boy did I miss you all.

Have you traveled anywhere cool lately? Whether it's a camping trip, road trip, another state, or an entirely new country, let me know down below!

Have a wonderful rest of your week dear friends,

Elizabeth