Monday, October 31, 2016

Hey There November

Hey everyone,

First off, can I just say thank you? Thank you for all your sweet words on my last blog post. Seriously, you all made my day. You lovely people never fail to make me feel welcome, loved and supported. I can't express how thankful I am for you all. Just know I may have cried a little bit and wanted to give you all ginormous hugs. 

So if you haven't been paying attention, it's October 31st, aka the last day of October, aka Halloween, aka one day left till Christmas music and all things holiday cheer. This year has flown by and I can't believe there are only two months left! I've had an amazing October, though, and I'm looking forward to see what the next couple of months have in store. Nervous, yes, but looking forward to it all the same. 

Currently// Missing reading constantly and having time to write book reviews, continuing to figure out my college classes and writing a ton, being excited about changes in my life and scared about others, enjoying the company of good friends, walking in the rain but kind of enjoying it, and soaking up the beautiful colors and feelings of Autumn.

Reading// The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger because I've been in such a slumpy mood and extremely busy. Also, City of Lost Souls by Cassandra Clare because Ms, Clare never fails to drain the reading slump from me.

Enjoying// Christine's post, Catching Up. Olivia's post, Jules. Cally's posts, He Comes and Clear This Head. Julia's posts, idk and The Smile.  Elissa's post, I Want a Band-Aid.

Watching// Gilmore Girls. So I still haven't finished the last season of Gilmore Girls. I know, I know, how could that be?? So my mom kind of spoiled the ending for me a while back (thanks mom) and I've really been dreading it because I don't want that to happen!! But the revival is coming up soon, so I've been trying to finish. It's still amazing and the coziest fall show ever. Also, I've been watching Monica Church's vlogs recently. I'm not sure what it is, but I just really love her video style, plus she lives in Washington. REPRESENT *virtual high five*

Loving// Writing whatever comes to mind without filtering, making use of my desk and trying to use good posture, evening yoga, watching the leaves turn colors, passing a group of super cute ducks every morning on my way to class, worshiping my Lord with friends, late night talks with my mom, and morning cuddles with my pup.

Disliking// Anxiety at the weirdest times, catching up on math, getting sick twice in three weeks, looking for work and never finding anything, awkward small talk, the fact that Netflix took The Nightmare Before Christmas off, and people making me feel like I'm ten.

Blogging// Travel Diary: Oregon Coast - Part 2, where I talk about the last part of our Oregon trip. Hey There October, where I talk about what happened in September and my feelings about October. this is not the end, where I write because sometimes speaking doesn't say enough. Follow Me Around: The Pumpkin Patch, where I share some photos of a cute kid and a fun day. My Fall Playlist, where I share some of my favorite songs for the season. And i'm ok, where I get a little personal.

Upcoming// Possibly doing a play on NaNoWriMo, but instead of writing a novel, writing a piece of poetry every day and giving you all weekly updates. My oldest brother's 21st birthday on November 6th and my other older brother leaving for the Air Force on November 15th. OH MY GOSH WHERE HAS TIME GONE?

How was your October? What new things are coming your way this November? Let's chat!

With love,


Sunday, October 23, 2016

i'm ok

how are you
they ask

i'm ok
i say


it's 12 am
and i feel

noise i hear
shakes me

doubt haunts
my thoughts

i toss
i turn


it's 6 am
and i
don't want to
start this day

it feels
too much

i lift my feet
and i touch the ground

you've got this
i say
you're ok


it's 3 pm
and i feel




full of doubt


how are you
they ask

i'm ok
i say
with a smile

i hope
they'll realize
i'm not

that's great
they say
me too

but they don't
so i keep going
i pretend
i lie


it's 8 pm
i am so

but the day feels so
and i'm afraid
because what if
i don't feel ok


it's 11 pm
i don't cry
i can't cry
i'm confused
why do i feel this way

hey papa god
i say
i'm not feeling ok
help me


sleep comes
i'm ok
sometimes i'm not
and that's ok too

A little note// Hey guys <3 So lately I've been thinking back a few years ago when I was really struggling. With mental illness awareness week just passing, and some recent events happening close to home, I've been thinking a lot about the concept of being "ok" and how people fake it so much. A few years ago, I was dealing with a lot of anxiety and dark thoughts and I tried so hard to hide it from everyone else. I still deal with anxiety, but I've been realizing the importance of confiding in others.I wrote this because it's ok to not feel ok. And it's ok to tell others you're not ok. So please, if you're dealing with some stuff right now, don't be afraid to talk to someone about it. Your parents, siblings, friends, pastor, me. Don't ever feel like you're alone. And even more importantly, don't ever forget that we have a Lord who loves you, and He never gives you more than you can handle. You've got this.

With love,


Tuesday, October 18, 2016

My Fall Playlist

Hello beautiful people,

So I'm not one to make playlists for each season, but I haven't been feeling the fall vibes lately, so I decided it was time to create a fall playlist. Honestly, it's been a lot of fun! I really love all the music I've found and it is certainly helping me get in the fall mood. I love music, especially when doing homework or driving, so this playlist has come in handy. I decided to share it with you all because it's always nice to find new music, at least, I think so. ;) So without further ado, let's begin with the list.

Evening Sun
Jon Bryant, What Takes You. 

Who Are We Fooling? [feat. Aqualung]
Brooke Fraser, Flags.

Seafret, Tell Me It's Real.

Something Beautiful
Andrea Marie, Here Begin.

Never Be Alone
Shawn Mendes, Never Be Alone.

River of Tears
Alessia Cara, Know-It-All.

Strahan, Posters.

Walk the Moon, Walk the Moon.

Against the Current
Mree, Grow.

The Escape
Friendly Savages, O, Joshua!

Meadowlark, Dual.

Dear True Love
Sleeping At Last, Yearbook.

Tim McMorris, I'd Choose You Again.

North Caroline
Little Chief, Lion's Den.

Cold Arms
Mumford & Sons, Wilder Mind.

The Village, The Wolf, and The Boy
Taylor Berrett, Great Falls.

Alex's Song
Grayson  Kessenich, Where Your Heart is. 

More in Love With You [feat. Nelly Joy]
Jason Reeves, Songs are Silent Films. 

Get updated when I add new songs by following my Spotify playlist. 

And there you have it, a bunch of new songs to listen to this fall. What about you? Any favorite songs/playlists you enjoy this time of year? Leave me a comment down below and let me know.

With love,


Saturday, October 15, 2016

Follow Me Around: The Pumpkin Patch

Hello Everyone,

Last Friday, during a short break in the rain, my mom and I took the little boy I nanny to the pumpkin patch. I snapped a few pictures of Slater and thought it would be cool to share them with you. I haven't posted in awhile, which I feel terrible about! Guys, I have been so busy. I was house sitting, I've had multiple essays due, and now Washington has this huge storm going on and the electricity has been going off. I'm sorry for my absence, but hopefully I can be back at it soon.

Anyways, we had loads of fun and he was so cute! The entire time he ran around yelling, "This is fun, this is fun!" It was adorable. Of course, being the little boy he is, he spent most of his time looking at the big tractors and splashing around in the puddles instead of looking for the perfect pumpkin and getting pictures by the sunflowers. It was still really nice to get him out of the house and run around. Normally, we just say at his house, so this was a special treat.

And guys, I now feel like it's fall! Between the trip to the pumpkin patch, rainy days, and color changing trees, something has clicked in my mind and I'm excited. Fall has always been my favorite season. I love the colors, the weather, the clothes, and it gives me the excuse to watch The Nightmare Before Christmas multiple times. Seriously, that movie is the best. It also allows teenagers and grown adults to dress up, so that's exciting. I'm trying to decide on what to be for my youth group's costume party. Any suggestions? I kind of want to be Pooh Bear and walk around with a jar of honey, but is that odd? I don't know, leave me some feedback down below!

I hope you all have been having an amazing fall so far. What's your favorite thing about the season?

With love,


Wednesday, October 5, 2016

this is not the end

my dear
dear friend
i'm so sorry
this world
has brought you such sadness
i am so sorry
this world
has failed you
i'm so sorry
this world
has hurt you


my dear
dear friend
this world is not the end
this world is only the beginning
our father has a place
for us
for you
for her

so remember
remember the laughs
the joys
the hugs
the smiles
remember the good times
and know
you'll see her again

my dear
dear friend
you are not alone
our father is there
to comfort you
love you
protect you


this world is not the end
it's only the beginning
of something much
much more

with love


Monday, October 3, 2016

Hey There October

Hello everyone,

I don't want to be that annoying person who says "I can't believe it's October!!" But I really can't. In my mind, it still feels like summer, not sweater weather and pumpkin season. Obviously, I need to start lighting autumn candles, wearing fall clothing, and making trips to the corn maze, but so far that hasn't happened. I do love fall, though, so I'm excited to get more into the spirit this October. 

Currently// Trying to figure out my college classes, house sitting a circus of five animals, driving way more than any human should, missing my puppy (and yes, you too mom), and spending way too much on coffee while doing homework.

Reading// Forest of Ruin by Kelley Armstrong. This series is taking forever for me to finish, and I'm really frustrated because nothing is turning out how I wanted it and I'm kind of ready to throw it off a cliff, but I'm also so close to finishing, so I feel like I need to, you now what I mean?  Also, Letters and Papers from Prison by Dietrich Bonhoeffer. I haven't read a ton from this yet, but what I have read has been amazing and I'm excited to get more into it.

Enjoying// Julia's post, 15 minutesKate's post, The Post That Took Two Years to Write. And Ashlyn's post, Darkness Will Not Win.

Watching// Heartland has become one of my new go to shows. I'm not even a horse person, but for some reason, I really enjoy this series! Also, my mom got me started on Call of the Midwife, and that too has been a show I've consumed this past month. Plus, the bonus of these two shows is that they have a ton of seasons on Netflix, so I don't have to worry about finding a new series anytime soon. 

Loving// Blackout poetry, steaming cups of Tazo Earl Gray tea, Sundays and watching my Seahawks play, Kirkland Pacific Blend coffee in the afternoons, book mail, my English 101 professor and outings with my favorite mama. 

Disliking// Driving on Friday nights and being behind tipsy drivers, dog hair clinging to all my black clothes, having a terrible runny nose in the middle of class, Spotify not finding proof I'm a student (I WANT THAT DISCOUNT GUYS!!!), and driving towards the morning sun without sunglasses. 

Blogging// Hey There September, where I talk about what's happening as we come into the month of September. Mid-Year Book Freak Out, where I update you with all my reading news. Worth It, where I share a little bit of my heart and attempt to be artsy in my formatting. And Travel Diary: Oregon Coast - Part 1, where I share a few pictures from my trip to Florence, Oregon. 

So what's happening with you as we enter into October? 

With love,


Saturday, October 1, 2016

Travel Diary: Oregon Coast - Part 2

Hello friends, 

I'm back with another photo bomb of my trip. (Check out part one here). I went to a few of my bloggy friends and held a little poll. Should I post round two right away, or put up something else before. Round two won out, so here I am with more pictures from my trip down to Oregon. Bare with me guys, for when I was uploading everything, I realized they were all pictures of the ocean. Oops. So you've been warned, this may give you the urge to go travel and sunbathe on the sand. 

About twenty minutes away from where we were staying was Heceta Lighthouse. Guys, this place was so beautiful! We went there about three times, and my mom and I even took a few senior pictures there. Seriously, there were so many perfect pictures to be taken  and we had to take every opportunity to do so. It was a really great place and I had a lot of fun exploring the beach with my family.

Look at these beaches. LOOK AT THEM!! They're so beautiful. I want to live there. I loved the variety each beach had. Some had lots of rocks, others were super sandy and had driftwood to climb around on, and then there were some with a little bit of everything. It was really cool to explore each one and see the things that made it different than others.

One of the last really cool places we got to scout out was Devils Churn. This place was beautiful, and a little scary. I made an extra effort to respect the ocean, for if I fell over, I would be a goner. My brother got a little too close, and a huge wave hit the rocks and soaked him. He wasn't so amused, but I was laughing pretty hard about it.

Overall, I had a really awesome time spending a week with my family and exploring new places. I'm beyond blessed to have the family that I have and the opportunities we've been given. Life is pretty good, guys.

With love,


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